You Deserve to Feel Good: Releasing the Guilt Around Joy

There’s a quiet, heavy truth that lives inside so many of us: We’ve been taught to feel bad for feeling good.

To shrink our joy so others feel comfortable. To hold our breath when happiness arrives, waiting for something to go wrong. To feel guilty when life finally feels light.

But here’s what I’ve come to learn.

Joy is not something you have to earn.

It’s something you already deserve.

Where Does the Guilt Come From?

That guilt isn’t random. It’s inherited. For many of us, joy was never modeled as something safe, sustainable, or sacred. We watched loved ones struggle. We were told not to laugh too loud, not to celebrate too much, not to make others uncomfortable with our happiness.

And so we learned to dim ourselves. To wait for the other shoe to drop. To feel unworthy when life began to feel good.

But beloved, hear this:

Joy is not a betrayal. It’s a birthright.

What Happens When We Suppress Joy?

When we deny ourselves joy, our nervous system stays in survival mode. We brace for pain. We fear softness. We live in a loop of “when will the happiness be taken away?”

And that creates emotional exhaustion—because we are wired for light.

How to Heal Your Relationship with Joy

Step 1: Name the Guilt. Ask yourself:

Where did I learn that I have to suffer before I can celebrate? Who made me feel like joy was unsafe? When did I start believing I didn’t deserve to feel good—right now?

Step 2: Speak the Truth. Create an affirmation that feels slightly rebellious but completely aligned. Here are three to choose from:

🕊️ “I don’t have to feel bad for feeling good.”💫 “My joy blesses the world.”🌺 “I am safe to enjoy my life.”

Say them. Whisper them. Write them on your mirror.

Step 3: Choose Joy—Guilt-Free. Do something today just because it brings you joy. No purpose. No productivity. Just because you’re alive.

Joy Is Not Selfish. It’s Sacred.

This is the revolution of emotional healing: Choosing joy without guilt. Choosing softness without shame. Choosing light—even when the world says you shouldn’t.

Because when you feel good, you radiate that feeling into the world. You heal your lineage. You give others permission. You say to the universe:

“I am ready to live in alignment, not apology.”

There is nothing more powerful than a healed soul who chooses joy on purpose. Not as a distraction. Not as a performance. But as a declaration:

“I deserve to feel good—because I am still here.”

And you are. You’re still here. Still rising. Still worthy.

Let that be enough. Let that be the reason. Let that be the medicine.

—With softness and sacred truth,

Coach Laura | Thalorah of Veloria™ Joy Midwife • Trauma Alchemist • Permission-Grantrix